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a Ram Thota's creation..

welcome to our Adda !!

Wednesday 6 March 2013

the 'C' school......


 
Admissions are open now. Preference to those with criminal background. relatives of Politicians get scholarship and free Bihar made revolver.
 
 
..
National Corruption Institute Of India
( N C I I )
Affiliated To Both Houses Of Indian Parliament
Listed on the World Corruption Index as the World’s Best C-School Invites Applications for 3 Years Undergraduate Bachelors Degree in Corruption. (BDC)
Earn your BDC from the World’s Most Reputed Institute for Corruption Studies
OUR COMPREHENSIVE SYLLABUS INCLUDES:
Financial Theory and Practice
  • Transfer of funds through HAWAALA for creation of MASS GHOTALA
  • FINANCIAL NETWORKING -Movement of money through well engineered networks between State Party Units and Central Party Unit.
  • Solicitation methods to increase donations towards Party Fund.
  • Theory and application of Popular BRIBE concepts and ­methods like ‘Chai Pani’, ‘Parcel’, ‘Change’, ‘Gift Box’ , ‘Color TV’, ‘Foreign Trip’ and the ever popular ‘Children’s School Fees’
  • Advanced course (on extra payment) for YSR Andhra model of dolling out public money for private funds.
 
  • Real estate Business
  • Learn how to multiply money with no capital
  • Fast track buying and selling of Govt/ properties legally.
  • How best to use family connections for personal gains. Weekly lectures byProf Robert Vadra, Prof.Jagan Mohan Reddy.
Public Relations (PR) and Media Management
  • Learn how to be MISQUOTED BY THE MEDIA.
  • Digvijay Singh's model of "Diversioanry tactics" by blaming RSS.
  • Lessons by Salman Khurshid on law of corruption.
  • Learn to say the right things to be QUOTED OUT OF CONTEXT.
  • Excellent training in PARTY SPOKESMANOLOGY. Learn how to argue on TV with other Party people on TV like Prof. Manish Tewari and Prof. Ravi Shankar Prasad.
  • Develop public gestures like NAMASTE and HAND WAVING.
  • By Rahul Gandhi
  • Learn the art of proving all allegations as “BASELESS AND POLITICALLY MOTIVATED”
  • Effectively refute STING OPERATIONS. Advanced course in proving that VIDEO FOOTAGE IS FALSE AND MANIPULATED.
Law and Order Module:

In this module you will learn how to:
  • Commit MURDER and RAPE
  • Bring LOCAL POLICE under your control
  • Get BAIL super fast if you are ever arrested.
  • Apply and get speedy ANTICIPATORY BAIL so you don’t get arrested in the first place!
  • FIGHT ELECTIONS FROM JAIL! Special lectures in this chapter by visiting Professors Shahbuddin and Pappu Yadav!
Advanced Riotology
  • Methods to build your own storage houses for HOCKEY STICKS AND WEAPONS to engineer riots.
  • Identify and develop your own fuel depots for easy and widespread dispersal of RIOT FRIENDLY PETROL TANKERS.
  • Form effective partnerships with local liquor stores for easy procurement of ‘DESI DARU’ to get rioters high and ensure awesome rioting!
  • Full study in CONTEMPORARY BUS BURNING. New age exciting methods for INSTANTANEOUS BUS COMBUSTION.
  • Introductory Kashmir method of inciting riots through STONE THROWING.
  • Actual rioting demonstrations under the expert tutelage of Professor Pravin Togadia.
  • Six months all expenses paid study tour to Kashmir for onhand riot-training.
Gain Extensive Knowledge From Our Faculty Of
World class Professors.
Special Courses In:
  • "2G SPECTRUM – A Telecommunications Perspective" By Professor Andimuthu Raja
  • ''Flat Taking From Army Jawan'' ByProfessor Ashok Chavan
    ''Sports Medal or No Medal, In Corruption Always Get Gold Medal'' By Professor         Suresh Kalmadi
  • "Application of Corruption on Non Human Species – Stealing Money from Cattle Fodder" By Professor Laloo Prasad Yadav
  • "Building A Corridor For The Taj Mahal Can Cost More Money that of building the Taj Mahal Itself" By Professor Mayawati Kumari.
  • How to attract vote bank from neighboring countries and provide immediate citizenship and voter ids and still remain "secular".
Visiting Professors: Digvijay Singh, Kapil Sibal, Shinde, Dr Manmohan Singh under able guidance of Smt Sonia Gandhi. 
  • Systematic destruction of a country by extensive loot and investing in Swiss banks by Professor from Cambridge A Maino & Sonia.
  • How to change your name to deceive people and keep hidden nationality. by professor A Maino & Sonia.
...And Many Many More..!!
When you think of corruption think NCII 
          NCII IS THE BEST…!!!!!

Application can be downloaded fron http://www.coppruptindia.com on payment of 2000 Dinars to Swiss account No. 2000-1223-9876-0129 on or before 31st march 2013. (SC,ST candidates can apply by paying Rs.2000 to our partner company http://govtofindia.com
                                            source: "saikor" Group